I'm not sure what it is about this season of my job that seems to annually trigger this super fun emotional experience for me but I find myself having a tougher week this week than most other weeks. I know I'm tired. I'm not sleeping as much as I should be but I have so much going on and I can't get the sleep I need right now. My eyes/eye lids have been twitching for what seems like weeks now and I find myself wondering how much more I have in me. I looked back to this post last year that was a week later but some of the sentiments ring true once again.
Two things on my mind tonight. The first isn't so much a thing as it is an individual. There's this amazing person that I've been getting to know and I've loved every minute of it. The biggest downside is that they live 5 hours away...and that's frustrating. In so many ways it's so easy for me to look into the future and see my life with this person and yet, right now, it seems so unreachable and unlikely...and that's a little discouraging.
The second thing on my ming tonight is a new artist that I've been able to appreciate for a few weeks now. I posted a song of his earlier and came across another one recently that I really enjoy. This song relates to so many of my feelings.
I have a good life. That's not self-help repetitive talking trying to convince me that it's true. At times, such as these, I wonder if I've put too high of expectations on life for myself but I can't help but feel that my Heavenly Father has great things in store for me. I'm grateful for my blessings. I'm glad to have a good job that I enjoy. I'm thankful for so many of you who read this blog and continue to support and encourage me both silently & verbally.
I haven't written for a while and felt the need to get some feelings out before I try to sleep tonight. I apologize if this came off as a downer post. Sometimes it's nice to be real and not have to pretend that everything is rose-colored. It's been a nice break. :)
Time to screw in my smile and head back to reality...
**Note: After thinking about this blog, I'm not going to change anything written but rather add one note that sometimes reality isn't necessarily enjoyable, but it is a necessity in life. After all, if life is always good & rosy & perfect, how would we ever truly be able to appreciate how good our lives are. I know this. I just sometimes don't like reality....but who does I suppose. Here's to a better day. :)
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